When I bought my new car, my mom asked me to load a picture onto Face book so she could see it. I was hesitant to do so. At first, I wasn’t sure what was stopping me. I am trying to live my life more intentionally, so I reflected on my feelings for a bit, and came to the conclusion that I was hesitant to upload pictures to Facebook because I didn’t want anybody to know that I have a new car. I didn’t want certain people to think that I have money.
Those certain people include a friend (the same one that has taken advantage of me before) And some family members.
I’ve always felt like, if I share too much information with a few of my friends and family members, I’ll be completely taken advantage of. They will think that since I have a new car, I must have money to spare, and therefore take advantage of me. I probably sound like a paranoid schizophrenic right now, but my concerns are legitimate. I’ve been burned before; my behavior is learned.
For instance, when I told a family member that I had a credit card, he took advantage of me by charging his bills to it and not paying me back. When I told another family member that I was saving for an emergency fund, he stopped paying me for gas when using my car.
The thing is, while it might sound incredibly selfish that I don’t want to help my friends and family by paying
for their gas and bills, I feel like I should have a choice in the matter. It shouldn’t be the thought “well, you have more money than me, so I’m going to take advantage of that”.
Another reason I didn’t want to upload photos of my new car to Facebook, is because I didn’t want friends to assume that I have money because I have a new car, and automatically assume that means I can go out on shopping trips with them, or that I can go for dinner three times a week with them, or go to Vegas with them and drop a ton of money on useless things. In reality, I am still just as, if not more so, broke than I was before. I just needed a method of transportation. I’m not saying that I can’t – I’m sure I could do all of those things, if I wanted to forgo my contributions to my RRSP, or take out a loan for my tuition – and I can certainly afford, and budget for, coffees, dinners, and movies with friends and family.
I find that, even before I bought a new car, if I were in a financially stable spot, I would still act like I was broke to get out of spending money on useless things. Some people act like they are rich when they’re really broke, yet I act like I’m broke when I’m, well, not that broke. It’s turned into a tactic to protect myself from my irresponsible father, crazy family members, and spendthrift friends.
Have you ever pretended you are broke? If yes, why?