{"id":486,"date":"2011-10-24T09:00:26","date_gmt":"2011-10-24T16:00:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/add-vodka.com\/?p=486"},"modified":"2015-08-04T13:07:21","modified_gmt":"2015-08-04T20:07:21","slug":"domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/","title":{"rendered":"Domestic Equality: Why It’s Important and How to Achieve It"},"content":{"rendered":"

Being the mega-feminist I am (and that you should be too), I expect equality in my relationship. I live with my boyfriend, and have lived with him for well over five years now. At first, it was domestic bliss. I would regularly come home to dinner on the table and a spotless apartment.<\/p>\n

Fast forward three years, and I am still pretty lucky, but he hasn’t cooked for me in at least two years, and the house is constantly messy.<\/p>\n

My boyfriend’s mom was a stay at home parent for his whole life, and did most of the household chores while the kids were in school. As a result, he wasn’t responsible for much in the way of contributing to the home.\u00a0He doesn’t completely understand that you can’t just flake out of sweeping because\u00a0you<\/em>\u00a0don’t care if the floor is dirty.<\/p>\n

Now, I can understand, in some cases, that it can be fair if one person does the majority of the housework. If one partner stays at home, maintaining a lot of the household (though not the entire thing) becomes their job. However, reality is not such that many people can stay at home these days raising children, nor do many people particularly want to.\u00a0My lifestyle does not support gender stereotypes.<\/p>\n

In fact, since boyfriend is neither a student nor a professional (he’s in trades), and he works a 4 minute<\/p>\n

\"\"
Credit: feministing.com<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

drive from home, true equality would be if he did almost all of the cooking and almost all of the cleaning. But life doesn’t work like that.<\/p>\n

Domestic equality is super important, because inequality creates resentment and burn-out. A couple of weeks ago, I was so.fed.up. I came home every day to a crazy mess in the kitchen, which I either had to let pile up, or had to do the work at midnight when homework was waiting. There was dust everywhere, and laundry (albeit clean) taking over half of the bed.<\/p>\n

So I stewed. And I brooded. And I plotted. And I confronted boyfriend with a plan. I wanted to make a chore schedule.<\/p>\n

This, of course, created a huge fight. Why should boyfriend have to do chores that he doesn’t care gets done? (Yes, this was his argument. He said he didn’t mind washing his hands in a dirty sink – since I did, I should have to clean<\/p>\n

\"\"
Credit: buymeposters.com<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

it). He said that it was unfair that just because I was so busy, he had to do more chores, and that I expected us to split household chores evenly<\/a>.<\/p>\n

But when I really sat him down and talked to him about it – showed him all the things that he had never even came near with a scrub brush\u00a0which\u00a0stayed clean (because of me), and showed him how much work it was, he came around.<\/p>\n

He admitted that it wasn’t equal, which wasn’t fair. So we set out to make a chore list.<\/p>\n

We first listed all of the things that needed to get done, and categorized them as things that need to get done daily (dishes, garbage, tidying), things that need to get done weekly (vacuuming, bathroom being cleaned, windexing, dusting), things that need to get done bi-weekly, monthly (fridge cleaned, walls wiped down), etc.<\/p>\n

We then made a schedule where we alternated every chore. Things that he likes to do, he can do every time, and trade it for things that I like to do. I don’t mind vacuuming and mopping, and he doesn’t mind taking out the garbage. Since the prior is something done every week, and the latter is something done every day, the trade worked out great.<\/p>\n

We wrote this all out, and I got his input – I made sure he was a big part of the process – and so far, it’s been a breeze.<\/p>\n

We have all week to do our weekly chores. As long as they’re done by Sunday, it’s all good. There hasn’t been any fighting or frustration because we both know what is expected of us. It’s working great, though it’s only been two weeks. Although I might leave him for this guy.<\/p>\n

\"\"
Nothin’ sexier than a guy with a baby doing chores. Credit: elcivics.com<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Have you ever created a chore schedule? Do you struggle with domestic equality?<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Being the mega-feminist I am (and that you should be too), I expect equality in my relationship. I live with my boyfriend, and have lived with him for well over five years now. At first, it was domestic bliss. I would regularly come home to dinner on the table and a spotless apartment. Fast forward …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[232],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nDomestic Equality: Why It's Important and How to Achieve It<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"How to get your boyfriend to help with chores: domestic equality\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Domestic Equality: Why It's Important and How to Achieve It\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"How to get your boyfriend to help with chores: domestic equality\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"PF Simplified\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-10-24T16:00:26+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2015-08-04T20:07:21+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/t0.gstatic.com\/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1o4deKMhKLJBUemCGTCPeMfUNOMQS_nMzcWROgkf0AD2UzKjuFy7S8JEW\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Aaron\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Aaron\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Aaron\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#\/schema\/person\/71b99a90dd1c89201d7af08e80c932ca\"},\"headline\":\"Domestic Equality: Why It’s Important and How to Achieve It\",\"datePublished\":\"2011-10-24T16:00:26+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2015-08-04T20:07:21+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/\"},\"wordCount\":773,\"commentCount\":13,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\/\/t0.gstatic.com\/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1o4deKMhKLJBUemCGTCPeMfUNOMQS_nMzcWROgkf0AD2UzKjuFy7S8JEW\",\"articleSection\":[\"Life\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/\",\"name\":\"Domestic Equality: Why It's Important and How to Achieve It\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\/\/t0.gstatic.com\/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1o4deKMhKLJBUemCGTCPeMfUNOMQS_nMzcWROgkf0AD2UzKjuFy7S8JEW\",\"datePublished\":\"2011-10-24T16:00:26+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2015-08-04T20:07:21+00:00\",\"description\":\"How to get your boyfriend to help with chores: domestic equality\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"http:\/\/t0.gstatic.com\/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1o4deKMhKLJBUemCGTCPeMfUNOMQS_nMzcWROgkf0AD2UzKjuFy7S8JEW\",\"contentUrl\":\"http:\/\/t0.gstatic.com\/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1o4deKMhKLJBUemCGTCPeMfUNOMQS_nMzcWROgkf0AD2UzKjuFy7S8JEW\"},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Domestic Equality: Why It’s Important and How to Achieve It\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/\",\"name\":\"PF Simplified\",\"description\":\"When Life Gives You Lemons => ADD VODKA\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#organization\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#organization\",\"name\":\"Add-Vodka.com\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/\",\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/AV-HEADER-013-e1409411262210.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/AV-HEADER-013-e1409411262210.png\",\"width\":455,\"height\":127,\"caption\":\"Add-Vodka.com\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\"}},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#\/schema\/person\/71b99a90dd1c89201d7af08e80c932ca\",\"name\":\"Aaron\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ea2656c1dcdb6fde913881d41174ad6f?s=96&d=wavatar&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ea2656c1dcdb6fde913881d41174ad6f?s=96&d=wavatar&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Aaron\"},\"sameAs\":[\"http:\/\/www.add-vodka.com\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/author\/daisy\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Domestic Equality: Why It's Important and How to Achieve It","description":"How to get your boyfriend to help with chores: domestic equality","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Domestic Equality: Why It's Important and How to Achieve It","og_description":"How to get your boyfriend to help with chores: domestic equality","og_url":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/","og_site_name":"PF Simplified","article_published_time":"2011-10-24T16:00:26+00:00","article_modified_time":"2015-08-04T20:07:21+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/t0.gstatic.com\/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1o4deKMhKLJBUemCGTCPeMfUNOMQS_nMzcWROgkf0AD2UzKjuFy7S8JEW"}],"author":"Aaron","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Aaron","Est. reading time":"4 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/"},"author":{"name":"Aaron","@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#\/schema\/person\/71b99a90dd1c89201d7af08e80c932ca"},"headline":"Domestic Equality: Why It’s Important and How to Achieve It","datePublished":"2011-10-24T16:00:26+00:00","dateModified":"2015-08-04T20:07:21+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/"},"wordCount":773,"commentCount":13,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#organization"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/t0.gstatic.com\/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1o4deKMhKLJBUemCGTCPeMfUNOMQS_nMzcWROgkf0AD2UzKjuFy7S8JEW","articleSection":["Life"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/","url":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/","name":"Domestic Equality: Why It's Important and How to Achieve It","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/t0.gstatic.com\/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1o4deKMhKLJBUemCGTCPeMfUNOMQS_nMzcWROgkf0AD2UzKjuFy7S8JEW","datePublished":"2011-10-24T16:00:26+00:00","dateModified":"2015-08-04T20:07:21+00:00","description":"How to get your boyfriend to help with chores: domestic equality","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/t0.gstatic.com\/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1o4deKMhKLJBUemCGTCPeMfUNOMQS_nMzcWROgkf0AD2UzKjuFy7S8JEW","contentUrl":"http:\/\/t0.gstatic.com\/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1o4deKMhKLJBUemCGTCPeMfUNOMQS_nMzcWROgkf0AD2UzKjuFy7S8JEW"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/domestic-equality-why-its-important-and-how-to-achieve-it\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Domestic Equality: Why It’s Important and How to Achieve It"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/","name":"PF Simplified","description":"When Life Gives You Lemons => ADD VODKA","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#organization","name":"Add-Vodka.com","url":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/AV-HEADER-013-e1409411262210.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/AV-HEADER-013-e1409411262210.png","width":455,"height":127,"caption":"Add-Vodka.com"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"}},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#\/schema\/person\/71b99a90dd1c89201d7af08e80c932ca","name":"Aaron","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ea2656c1dcdb6fde913881d41174ad6f?s=96&d=wavatar&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ea2656c1dcdb6fde913881d41174ad6f?s=96&d=wavatar&r=g","caption":"Aaron"},"sameAs":["http:\/\/www.add-vodka.com"],"url":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/author\/daisy\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/486"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=486"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/486\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5458,"href":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/486\/revisions\/5458"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=486"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=486"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/add-vodka.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=486"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}