Most mornings (except for the ones that I hit the “snooze” button), I wake up, grab some coffee and settle down on the couch to go through my reader and see what’s new in the blogging world. I need this time to caffeinate myself before hopping in the shower and rushing to work.
Recently, I’ve noticed something that has always been there but I’ve never fully acknowledged while going through my reader. I, unlike many bloggers that I follow, take a less accepted stance on money. I just don’t care about it that much.
Sure, I blog about money. I enjoy money. It’s fun. I make it, I spend it, it helps me reach my goals. We all have it and I think it’s an important topic.
What I see a difference in, between myself and some of the blogging community, is the fact that the choices I make aren’t dictated by how much that choice will cost me.
Sure, money is a factor. If I don’t have the money, then I can’t make the choice. But if I have the money to do it, then I don’t let it sway my decision. Here are some examples:
Children
There have been many bloggers coming out and stating that they don’t want kids. Many of them quote the main reason for this as how expensive they are.
Frankly, I don’t care how expensive kids are. If I sit down and think about whether or not I’d want kids if money wasn’t an issue, the answer is, immediately and strongly YES.
When I was thinking about whether or not I want kids prior to even being a blogger, the cost of them never even crossed my mind. Sure, they’d be expensive, but why make and save and spend if there’s no family to enjoy it with?
If the answer to the question of whether you would want kids if money wasn’t an object is “no”, then that’s perfectly acceptable.
My House
We made the decision to buy our house based on three things:
- We need a place to live
- We hate renting (and we hate renting apartments, specifically)
- We’re not in the group of individuals that believes that the Canadian housing market is going to crash.
If we believed, or were presented evidence through our research that outweighed all other evidence to the contrary that we would be in financial ruin after buying the house, sure, we wouldn’t have done it. But we didn’t buy our house because we thought it would be a good investment. Undoubtedly, I was sick of paying somebody else’s mortgage, but that was just a bonus. We bought it because we wanted somewhere to land, that was “ours”. That we felt comfortable in, where we didn’t have to answer to anybody, and that we could be proud of. We wanted to set down some roots and own something and be proud of something.
I’m a homebody, and so is J, so it has been a huge blessing being comfortable in my surroundings since we moved in.
Furthermore, we want to have kids within the next 5-7 years, and I was raised in a house with a yard and a neighborhood. My family has always owned houses, so having a home for my family is what I have always known I would do.
Pets
I sadly see so many posts from many finance bloggers about how expensive pets are; ones that can’t afford them after getting one and end up giving it away, ones that refuse to get a pet based only on their costs, and ones that give away pets because of high vet bills or the cost of feeding them.
I don’t care that my pets cost money in food, vet bills, and upkeep. They don’t cost enough to stand in the way of my goals, and they make me happy.
If you aren’t an animal person, that’s fine, but if you love animals and want one, and having one is not going to stand in the way of your financial well being and goals, what are you hedging about?
Work Hard, Play Hard
I spend a lot of time making money. I would say between my online ventures and my full-time day job, I spend about 55 hours per week making money. I don’t count my babysitting side hustle in this calculation because I just watch TV and play with them half the time when I’m there.
But making this extra money helps me reach my goals, have my pets, drive a decent car, wear pretty clothes, go on the occasional trip and live in a house that I own, not somebody else’s home. I’m not even saying I play hard – that’s just not my personality – but I enjoy life.
I’m going to say the big no-no in the personal finance blogging community – brace yourselves:
YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I’m not saying you should use that as an excuse to quit your job, hop on a plane to New York and buy ALL THE THINGS while you are wallowing in $40K of student debt and on the brink of bankruptcy.
But letting money run your life – working 80 hours a week and not having kids, pets, or living the way you want to live just because of the cost? That’s just sad.
(It’s a different story if you remove money from the equation and you still don’t want these things. I’m not being a judgy Mcjudgerson if you don’t want kids or don’t like animals, just as long as you’re not sacrificing those things if you want them just because of money).
So – if you see yourself in this – STOP letting money run your life! Your the boss, not your cash!
LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!
I completely agree with this post. Lately I’ve been feeling debt fatigue. I have come to the conclusion as long as I’m paying a set amount on my bills/savings a month, I need to have fun with the rest. You only live once!
I find myself asking the question “for what purpose” quite a bit. When my buddy told me he could upgrade to a moon roof in his new car for only $6,000, or when I hear about people refusing to enjoy the sunshine because they want to work all weekend…
Oh, dear. That’s a lot of money for a window on the top of your car, haha. I mean, if it makes him super happy and he can afford it then I guess whatever floats your boat!
LOVE LOVE LOVE this post! So many people let money dictate everything about them, and don’t have any fun because they seem to be afraid of the costs. I love having a house, cars, and pets. They are all well worth it to me.
But… what if you can’t afford those things?
I think it’s called “being a responsible adult” if you recognize that you can’t afford to pop out 4 kids and have a herd of animals, regardless of if you want them or not.
This is a weird post.
This post is great! I find it sad that so many people will deprive themselves of the things I consider “normal” – a home, a pet, and a family – because they’re too worried about money. I hate the idea that EVERY SINGLE THING we do is supposed to be viewed in terms of ROI. I mean, honestly, if I looked at my son strictly as far as what he has cost me, I would just end up angry all the time. Does that mean I’m supposed to take him outside and beat him to death?
I wish more people used common sense and would just admit that they want certain things in life. It’s not always about money!
Love this post! I agree on all the things you`ve mentioned. I just can`t understand how some people can be so obsessed with money that they don`t want children because it`ll cost them money, or a house, or a pet. All those things are what I want from life. I can`t wait for the day that we`re ready to have a baby!Or we live a place where I can finally have my own dog. You can`t put a price on life!
Agreed, but with one proviso: being in debt lets money run your life. If you doubt that, just wait till you get laid off or the next recession come around. That’s when the creditors show their ugly side. Being out of debt is the best way to not let money run your life. As you say, you only live once, why live it in debt? 🙂
I am eating this one up. Well put. I agree with you in every aspect. I know that kids are expensive, but I love my son more than any amount of money. I will spend on a house, a car, and my hobbies in order to keep me happy. I want to enjoy my money when I want to. Yes, I want to retire with some money, but I won’t just drudge along just saving and investing only to have a boring life until I retire.
LOVE this post Daisy! I think you hit the nail on the head in regards to money. We bust our tails and it would be a shame not to enjoy some of the things in life because of the cost. Not everything needs to be looked at in terms of what we get out of it or what the “cost” is. Live is meant to be lived and enjoyed not in denying ourselves things because of how we may view what they would cost us.
Great post Daisy! Couldn’t have said it any better.
I’d say I spend about the same amount of time as you do, but you’re so right, the importance of getting a good balance between work and play is vital.
I am trying to not concentrate on the experience rather than money. Which is why I don’t “track” or write down everything I buy. We have a $ budget and we tend not to go over it.
There is a limit to this logic. Like you said, don’t overextend yourself. I know a lot of #yolos who owe a lot of $.
I agree with you for a lot of the bloggers out there. Yes pets and kids are expensive, but if they make your life more enjoyable… that’s what money is for!
I certainly wouldn’t say that we won’t have kids because we can’t afford them, who can? I do think that a balance and responsibility towards an individuals personal finance is important. That to me is a personal decision where some people don’t mind owing money for years on end and others don’t want that looming over their heads. Like one other poster said, debt can run your life just as much as money can IMO. Great post Daisy. 🙂
“Frankly, I don’t care how expensive kids are. If I sit down and think about whether or not I’d want kids if money wasn’t an issue, the answer is, immediately and strongly YES”
I totally agree with this! You will find a way to make the financial part work! =)
Your philosophy is very similar to mine. Money is simply a tool and spending money is finite.
My end goal isn’t to accumulate as much cash as I can. My end goal is to accumulate enough to meet my personal goals and milestones.
The second point is that spending money is finite and is based on your income/investment income. Every time I spend money, it’s a compromise of something else that I could have spent money on. This is true no matter how much money you make: it’s always a compromise. Achieving a balance in life is entirely personal and the cost should be a factor but not the only reason why a decision is made.
I agree for the most part. I mean life is too short and can change on a dime (no pun intended) and will you look back and say, “oh I saved EVERY penny” but they experienced nothing. I think the point of having/saving money is so that you can spend on things that matter TO YOU! I don’t want kids because I just never wanted them. Saving money by not having them is just the icing on the cake…to ME. I also know that when something happens to my cat, it will be awhile until I feel financially stable to get another pet. I love my pet, but I also have experienced the financial drain of when something goes wrong, and right now I’d really like to make travel a priority. So someone who would never have a pet or children, might spend a lot of money on entering running events, or riding horses. I think it’s just important to recognize that you should invest on things you value…not just things.
I couldn’t agree more with this post! I still have student loan debt but I am not going to let money run my life. Yes, I will agressively pay down my debt, but no I will not live like a hermit until I do so 🙂
I have to admit that I work most of the time to keep up with my financial obligations. But despite how busy I am, I still find time playing with my kids and have some relaxation once in a while.
Well said, Daisy! I love this post. You have a good outlook on money. At the end of the day it’s all about the people (and pets) you love and want to be around. NONE of the rest of it will matter when we leave this world. As for me and money, I am just pumped to get to a place where I can be comfortable and unemotional about money, using it to get me to where I want to be. I want to make a lot so I can enjoy my home and have lots of people over all the time, I wouldn’t give up my dogs and I’d love to have kids!!
You are not being judgmental about people who do not like animals, houses, or kids, but you *are* being judgmental about people who like these things, but like money more.
If it is the case that someone values money more than they value kids, isn’t it better that they don’t procreate? If they wouldn’t enjoy a house as much as they’d enjoy a pile of cash, who cares? If they value their money more than a pet, and wouldn’t be willing to give the pet the best care, wouldn’t we prefer they honor their preference not to have a pet?
All I am saying is, shouldn’t we be happy that people can choose money over other things if they want to? That doesn’t mean you have to feel threatened by their choices. All you have to say is “to each their own,” and not worry if your net worth sheet looks different than theirs. They’re not worried that you have more kids than them. 🙂 Just live your life!
I so agree! I do have to admit that we got rid of our turtle because of money, but it was legit because of money. We couldn’t afford to take care of her anymore and I wanted her to have a good home and a happy life. But I’m with you 100% on all of these!
I’ve always agreed with this mentality. If you can pay your bills and are saving for your future, then I think that you can use what’s left to enjoy life the way you want to. We have pets because we love dogs. We don’t have kids because we don’t want them right now. And we take random trips and eat out because that is what we see as fun. Money is to give flexibility and security…it shouldn’t be the only factor of every decision ever…
Great post! I definitely agree with you on the kids thing! Yes, children at expensive, but isn’t just about everything in life expensive? Why limit your happiness because of money? That’s the way that I look at it.