I’ve been an office worker for quite some time now, and as much as I love a team environment and getting to know my co-workers, I’ve noticed some pretty annoying office behaviours that I think are both irritating as well as comical.
As I have been in mainly administrator and assistant roles, I have had the opportunity to experience all of these first hand, and while I don’t really mind these types of behaviours (except for the last one), they can really get under the skin of other co-workers.
1. The Shuffler
That guy that goes to the printer and picks up the whole load of stuff you just printed – in alphabetical order – then shuffles it all up to find his Groupon deal in the midst.
When you get the printouts, the Z’s are with the O’s and Sally Smith’s accounting reports are chillin’ with your employee file letters like they’ve always been there, when in fact, they have not. Damn you, Mr. Shuffler.
2. The Pusher
No, not that kind of pusher. I’m talking about that person, who, when their assistant is away, drops a big pile of work on your desk like you volunteered to do it. And you didn’t. But their assistant is sick, and this has to be somebody’s problem, and because you’re typically pretty friendly toward Ms. Pusher and she likes your shirt, she picks you.
I liken this to how Brock, when faced with a battle, always chooses Pikachu despite being small and weak, and Pikachu can’t say no because a) he doesn’t talk and b) Brock doesn’t really give him the option as to whether or not he gets to fight. The pusher prays on the Pikachus of the workplace.
3. The Slammer
Oh, slammer, how I detest thee. This person both slams doors when leaving rooms, and bursts into doors when entering them. This person’s sole mission in life is to ensure the assistant has a heart attack before she turns 25. He usually thinks you were doing something terrible on your computer when you jump as he enters the room, but in reality it’s simply that his sudden and usually loud presence alarms you.
4. The Alert-er
This person is actually quite likable. They don’t mean to bug anyone, they’re merely concerned and considerate of their coworkers. This person is the woman who feels the need to alert you every.single.time. your phone rings. If you’re sitting at your desk watching your phone ring yet not answering it: “Hey, Tom! Your phone is ringing!”.
If you’re on lunch, trying to find some peace in your day: “Hey, Tom? Tom!!! Tom? Anyone know where Tom is? His phone is ringing” (you hear this faintly through the closet door that you’ve locked yourself in to avoid the Alerter’s alerts).
If you’re avoiding a phone call because you made a mistake and don’t want to own up to it, this person will pick up your phone for you, and come find you with it. The alerter is the most tolerable, because they mean well, but sometimes… ::headdesk:::
5. The Meeter
This guy would like nothing more than to have meetings all day, every day, 365. It’s truly his favourite activity, so much so that you can envision him calling a dinner meeting at home, or scheduling in a “bedtime story” meeting with his kids before bed.
The Meeter will force his colleagues into a meeting for every last thing, including but not limited to:
- Lunch
- Breakfast
- Coffee
- His half birthday
- YOUR half birthday
- A coworker’s mistake
- A coworker’s hard work
- Selling girl guide cookies for his kid
- To learn how to operate the printer
- To discuss a minor detail on a project
- To discuss a major detail on a project
- To discuss a major detail on somebody else’s project
- To book a meeting.
The meeter will typically assume that you, like him, cannot keep your day organized without frequent and detailed notifications in your Outlook calendar, and force these invitations on you which clutter your Outlook calendar and pop up with a notice every five minutes to alert you of yet another meeting.
The Devil
There are no words. These are the people who bring tuna, salmon, or really any member of the fish family to work for lunch, and then proceed to use the common microwave to heat it up.
If they don’t use the microwave, they’ll wander around with their tuna sandwich, spreading the stench of tuna in the air (particularly in your personal office, which is small and has no window), for all to gag over. This person is the devil.
Do you have any of these work personalities at your job? Which one is your most hated? Maybe you ARE one?
I am pretty sure Brock always chose a rock Pokemon, and you are referring to Ash.
Nerdom aside, the pusher is my total nemesis. I often get stuff dumped on my desk simply because I am young and female. This happens repeatedly, despite the fact that there are less senior employees (all males) who are kicking around with way less initial work.
I would say nearly everyone at my work is the same. None of us do anything too annoying thankfully.
My life is *surrounded* by “slammers”. I call them “hurrican people” because when they show up the noise level immediately increases and I become distracted and fixated on that person. Unfortunately, I have hurricane people outside of my workplace too :S
For me, it’s the shuffler. When I was working for a financial services company years ago, I was responsible for filing reference materials for the library. We got a newspaper delivery every morning that was suppose to come to my department first. However, a certain female employee always used to snatch it up, and mix up the sections. It was so annoying.
For some reason we have a guy here that talks on the phone constantly. I will give you his routine in a moment. He is friends with the bosses and gets away with it.
8-830 coffee and socialize
830-930 work or atleast we think he does..could be shuffling papers.
9-1230 talk, he is into alot of fantasy sports so he does those. work minimally except at month end.
1245-145 lunch he leaves to go let his dog out at home.
145-2 get back into swing of things.
2-430 work, talk, come over and get water near water cooler and find any opportunity to talk about sports anything. This guy is the most useless guy i have ever met. He is friends with tthe boss and the boss picks up his slack. uggh im irritated just writing this.
It has died down recently, but the girl that sits near me is always on the phone too. I have never talked to her in my life but I know every detail of her life (her restaurant reservations, roommate problems, boy problems…) based on her personal phone calls and loud voice!
Yeah… we have pretty much all of these and they’re definitely pretty annoying! I wonder what type I am… I hate meetings, but I’m a bit social at work, so I’m probably closer to that.
By the way, I think you need to find a new place to park your car at work… 🙂
Laughing to myself about #4. Yeah, I hear my phone, I’m not deaf…I’m ignoring it. Leave me alone 🙂
LOL. You. are. funny.
I really get bothered with the The Meeter that can’t even be on time to his own meetings. That drives me insane.
I have a whisperer…she’s always whispering to people like she’s 12 and telling secrets. This person is also a slurping-sniffler…she seems to not know how to use a kleenex to blow her nose. Rather, she slurps her nose the way some people slurp soup. Add in her hyena laugh, she’s just all-round generally annoying. Thankfully I don’t have to interact with her much, but I do have to sit by her. Oy.
And don’t forget “the tortured student” — they’re the ones who are always talking about how much work they have, and yet they accomplish less than the quieter folks.
I hate the devil. He brings in tuna everyday with a hardboiled egg and makes it in his cubicle.
There’s also the guy with the booming loud voice who talks so much it gives me a headache.
The guy who always asks how to do a simple function on excel. Cuz he’s like 60 yo.
The passive-aggressive dude who doesn’t talk but will use every excuse to make you look bad.
Ooh, the Alert-ers… those people drive me nuts!
I’ve got one. I’ve annoyed coworkers before by trying too hard. My manager even said to me once “I bet you were teacher’s pet in school, too, weren’t you?” I toned it down after that 😳
My biggest personality pet peeve is people that think even the simplest tasks are of the greatest and utmost importance. And that if they are not completed in a moments notice the world will end. When in reality the task could wait a few hours, even days, or probably even forgotten and nothing would come of it.
We had one awful girl at work.
She thinks she is the reason our business stays open, but if anyone else comes in all cherry and up beat she will tell them “I know you think you’re all that, but you’re not.”
She’s ridiculous.
There is only one person I work with who really gets to me. I would call him *The Know It All*. He’s the type of person who will jump into every conversation possible to give his two cents and the reasons why he is right. He drive’s me nuts.
I was worried I’d find myself in this list… I’m “the devil,” apparently! I occasionally bring tuna fish or egg salad for lunch, although I don’t heat it. And I work in a small room with 4 other people and no window. Honestly, I don’t think those dishes smell hardly at all – definitely not in comparison with the hot food I and my coworkers eat. Do I have a defective olfactory system??
These are all good, but we also have another type – the Needy. Someone who sucks up tons of time with their issues and problems (I’m their manager, so I do have to make time to listen and attempt to deal with the issues, imagined or not!)
Please, please… just go do your job and stop trying to come up with creative ways to get out of working!!
Uuugggghhhh, I hate the meeter! 👿
I am “the devil” but not for the reasons you think. My work place has a no parfume policy which is reasonable to adhere to.
What is not reasonable are the devil-haters that have taken this no-odour policy one step further and have gotten rid of the microwaves so that our yummy heated lunches will not bother co-workers. It gets worse… I had a complaint when I was peeling my orange that the natural smell offended my cubicle neighbour.
At some point, one need to draw a line and suck it up so to not be invaded with unreasonable policies that pleases a single person.
Awesome post, Daisy! The people you business folks have to deal with! From the outside, it sounds pretty funny. Maybe sometime I’ll come up with a list of the blue collar worker personality types… the tool swiper, the lazy man… already coming up with some!
I’ve almost always gotten along with all my coworkers. But if there was a devil at my office I’d either quit or confront them about it. Tuna is THE grossest smell…
Ugh, I can’t stand The Meeter who likes to have meetings about meetings. The whole meeting ends up talking about things that require what…you guessed it, another frigging meeting!
Can’t say I’ve met any of these find folks. Perhaphs a pusher or two, the kind that just barge into an office without knocking and just start talking.
Can’t go wrong with a Pokemon reference!
You should read “The Five Dysfunctions of a Team” by Patrick Lencioni. From your recent work/intership-oriented posts, I think you’d enjoy it.
This is why I hate people. No, seriously.
One of the things I miss about working with others is complaining about these personalities. It’s been a while, but I remember detesting ‘The Meeter’ setting up meetings to talk about absolutely nothing.
I also hated the ‘Constant Caller’ calling to ask “so anything happen”… “umm, nothing since you called 5 minutes ago”.
The Meeter, is the one I hate most when you’re being called just to determine the schedule or details of still another mega awful meetings ahead. For some reason, I still like the Alert-er. 🙂
I think I would have to add The Trasher in the list. The Trasher is anyone who uses the Copier machine and leaves his wrinkled paper just about anywhere, unmindful whether he aimed the trash in the bin or not.
you forgot the “frenemie” who seems nice to gain trust then talks behind your back and tries to throw you under the buss every chance she gets! ive been here three years she has been here almost five months… just waiting for boss to see through her lies and get rid of her. im super nice to her too which makes her more angry towards me. i tried asking her what her problem was in a nice way and all she did was complain about everything and everyone and not a real reason so not sure what else to do….it all started when she found out i was pregnant and she has pocs and idk maybe she is jealous. She really lost it for no reason and almost cried while complaining like she feels everything gets dumped on her. i tried to sympathise because i felt the same way in the begining. Thats the thing about working unsupervised some will got out of there way and others will do nothing they were supose to and make up excuses why. she just seems to take it all out on me and im sick of it! i like my job but find myself bothered before getting in like oh what do i have to listen to this time or whats gonna be her problem with me tonight. She is very hostile and has these sarcastic responces for no reason. Im polite and professional with her then on her way out the door her these sly remarks honestly i would not be sad if she quits in the middle of a shift. i tryed talking to her im nice to her i dont know what else to do.